Feral
by AngelClara
Summary: A young child is sucked into M.E. and brought up as Saruman's daughter. She is taught twisted values of good and evil...she is truly feral..........


Feral  
  
And so I cry. The melody fills my ears........... So haunting and pure. "Daddy" I whisper. His grave is fresh and new, drew clings to the grass along side it. Soon he would be gone. He wouldn't like the dirt. He always loved the trees. He didn't like below the Earth, he said shadows haunted the depths. I close my eyes. I can still hear the music. Like flutes fluttering past me and a voice............. I don't want the music to stop. Its freeing me, saving me, it makes me cry but thats okay.....I want to cry, but my grief. It hurt so much. I couldn't get away. Tears pour down my face mingling with the rain cascading down from the sky. "My fault" I whispered tracing the headstone. If I had been quicker. Just a little. 'Heaven works in strange ways' he used to tell me. But I don't see this as a strange working, I see this as an act of spite. "My fault" Night falls but I stay there. The music has gone now and I knew it couldn't stay. It wasn't just for me, its to be shared with others. Its not from a place we know of. Not from this world. I pull a daisy from my pocket. I'd taken it from the meadow next to the tree that he loved so much. "Here Daddy" I placed it gently in a vase. Something started happening then, the daisy started to glow. Its faint white colour pulsated a eerie blue. I don't know why but I placed a single finger on a petal. It was so beautiful. Something drew me in then. Pulling me. Some force. Everything was moving,blurring. I was being pushed and pulled to and fro. Like gravity pulling down a bird. Sucking me down a plug hole. I'm drowning in darkness. Its so dark, so scary so.........peaceful. But my warm Sanctuary is about to be disposed of. I can see a light. So harsh and blinding. I can hear it's voice. It is the song. The one that let me cry. "I am the song of Making" Its voice floated slicing through the air like a blade but it held a softness also. "What do you want?" I said tiredly. Its laugh echoed through the blackness and I could see whatever it's song touched transformed into something beautiful. "I don't WANT anything from you, I want something FOR you" My head shot up. Though I'm not sure if thats how I should put it. I didn't feel as if I was in a body, I just felt as if I was. If I was just being. Just for that moment I was nothing yet I was everything. "What to you want for me?" I whispered. The thing laughed again causing flowers to sprout from nowhere. "I want you to forget, just for a little while" I rocked backwards shocked. My gasp echoed in my ears. The Song sighed. Light filled my vision. It was so warm, I shut my eyes trying to block out the light. It stung like looking into the sun, but it was too late, the vision was already melded into my eyelids. Something was sucked out of me. Something all this light. Its all so confusing. Who am I? Where am I? Why is everything sparkling? Why is there....blackness?  
  
I woke up and rubbed my head. What was this place? The morning air smelt sweet. But there was a sound. A heavy crunching and roaring squeals. I shivered. They sounded unpleasant. As shapes neared I could see monsterous beasts. They carried sharp swords, razor blades. "We are Uruk Hai!" They yelled. I whimpered. That was a very wrong move. One of the Uruk Hai moved my way and started sniffing. He caught me straight away. He pulled me up by the scruff of the neck and held the sword at my throat. "What shall we do with her? Master didn't say nothin' bout little men- childs" One of the other creatures grinned at me. It was different. It looked like a brown, grotesque pumpkin. Its eyes small and squidgy. "Take her to Master" I found myself being thrown over tall beast. It's eyes glowed red. Is this normal? I thought. But I had more problems then wondering about where I was. I was more concerned about the pressing question: Who am I?  
  
The tower was tall and scary. I felt fear.Irrational but true. An old man came from the entrance. He smiled sweetly his white hair glimmering in the sunlight. "Uh. I see you have found my daughter" I frowned. Daughter? Something was wrong with that word. A feeling of sorrow washed over me. What was going on? Daughter.......no thats wrong. The word daughter implies a father or mother. I had neither. 'How do you know?' a scary voice said. It rose from deep within me. 'You don't know who you are, he could be father'. "Father?" I asked. The words escaped timidly. The white haired man smiled. "I am Saruman and I am Father"  
  
2 months had past since I came here. I looked at the Orcs. There where men and goblins here, but I trusted them no more than I trust a bug. Thery would slit my throat given half the chance. The only thing stopping them is father. I looked into the orb. Father had forbbiden me to enter this room but I couldn't resist. There was a voice that called me. The orb sparkled a white colour. Father told me this orb was evil but it couldn't be. It soothed me and reminded me of something I'd long forgotten. Father was wrong. I liked this orb better than the black one. When I looked into the black one all I could see was an eye made of fire. The eye talked to me saying I wasn't evil not really. It said that Father bred me to be what I was, but I was good at heart. I spat on the ground. Good. That word was so horrible. Father told me tales of how the good tried to kill you. That good would slaughter you whilst you were sleeping given half a chance. I saw the orb change colours and I stared deep within it. I could see myself as I was at the moment. Black hair cascaded down my shoulders, tied back in a messy bun. Strands flittered out everywhere. My eyes were dark brown. Father called them wood eyes for when he had first seen me they had been hazel. I remember him scoffing at hazel. He said it was like trees, just like what the good ones loved. I shuddered. I wanted nothing that the good ones had. NOTHING. Black smudged my lips and eyes. The only hint of anything "good" about me was a white plait or braid entwined with gold. Father said it marked me as being one of his. Made him white and wise as he was. I stroked the plait tenderly. I so wanted to make an impression on him. To make him think that I was smart enough to lead his troops to war. Good was trying to end us and Father wanted to fight back. I saw myself in the orb again. The image changed. My eyes were the hazel colour and my hair was light brown. I pulled away in revultion. "I see you've been looking in the orb again Sarudmal." I looked at Father then looked at the ground. "I'm sorry Father, but it called." Father looked away from me in disgust. "So goodness wants you" "No!!!" I yelled. Tears fell from my eyes. "I don't want to be good!" Father looked at me approvingly."Good, Sarudmal. Good is something not to be tampered with. The reason that its so trecherous is that it converts you." I shuddered in fear. "I'll take your troops to war. I shalln't stay here in this fortress and let good take me" Father smiled at me. His nail glided down my cheek cutting it. My blood flowed over his hands and I winced in pain. "Yesssssssssss, my Sarudmal. You will go to war......and you shall do me proud." I nodded willingly. If that was his will...........so be it.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Disclaimer: No owny Tolkein bookies. AN: Please review. I'll love you forver!!!!!!!! You're not feeding my ego if you review....you're feeding my writing skill. Claire 


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